Today was my last day of the job. Normally at work, I try to keep my cool so you can imagine the overwhelming surge of emotions I felt as I said goodbye to coworkers-turned-friends. I will miss them dearly, and I sincerely mean it when I say that. Although the last three months have been the most painful for me, I realized how much I’ve grown as a person and how jumping and venturing forth into the world of Freelancing with very little cushion could be the best thing for me.
That being said - it truly was.
I took some time and researched the company I was interviewing for. That only took about thirty minutes of my time, but I came up with about twelve questions to ask them but knowing just bits and pieces about the company. I was itching to do something else less mundane, but I wasn’t sure what it was.
So I spent the early night brainstorming ideas with one of my beloved, somewhat high-profile blogger friends about his blog. While I was supposedly just wireframing the layout for him, I ended up creating a concept that I am likely going to run with. He was excited at the ideas I presented to him, and soon enough, I had the concept drafted on paper in pink ink.
After speaking to my childhood friend for two hours on the phone, I sat down and proceeded with my research… Again, I got bored. On my desk were logo designs I’ve drafted a few nights ago but was initially hesitant to try on Illustrator. Well - let’s just say they are now in computer format and are ready to be critiqued by my best friends (and the harshest critics - the ones that can make me run home bawling like a baby!).
What a night.
I felt as though (temporarily) leaving my 9-5 lifestyle opened the floodgates of creativity. Suddenly, I did not feel as “stuck.” I did not feel the pressure to conceive something creatively - it just came even so accidentally. Maybe this was what I needed all along?
Who knows?
Reminds me - this blog needs to have MY design on it. BLEH!
I am down to my final two days working at my soon-to-be former employer. I promised myself never to be an in-house designer again (unless variety is offered), and to find work with flexible hours, as much as possible I gave myself a deadline as I celebrated my 28th birthday this Tuesday: I will be running my business full time by my 30th birthday.
I am known to make lofty goals, jumping, and taking risks. I would not have moved to Toronto over four years ago if I had not been so gutsy. I do not even consider myself a brave person - in fact quite the oppposite! But I feel that to advance in life, I really must do my best to expand my comfort zone.
I’m slightly (ok, not really) terrified of the fact that my options hang in uncertainty at this point. A job offer is pending, I have a couple interviews next week, and freelance deals have not been secured. I have to get out of the 9-5 mentality and start aggressively searching for jobs myself. If I can cold-call design agencies for internship and move to an unknown city far away from my immediate family, I am sure I can network and find work for myself - as a freelancer. Surprisingly enough, much as I’ve consistently expanded my comfort zone by engaging in “gutsy” behaviour, I still feel that finding work and proving someone why you kick ass is perhaps one of the most difficult things for me.
I really have to put my blinders on and believe - and truly believe that I effin’ ROCK! Nab the jobs, run my business, make mistakes and learn from it.
That’s my goal in the following months. It will be scary but being my tough double-Aries cardinal self, I can kick ass.
If there are any readers of this blog, I apologize for not having been active for almost two months. My period of absence was filled with rush jobs to prepare for my day job’s website relaunch, fitting in multiple freelance projects, contemplating on life, and trying to keep my sanity. Stress was overwhelming for the last two months that I have forgotten how much I loved running and how to even sleep.
However, a breakthrough happened in my professional life. For the first time in years, I did the unthinkable: I resigned from my day job. Mind you, I’ve resigned from four of my previous day jobs before this, but resigning this time around became a monumental period in my life. First of all, I resigned without certainty. I had a pending offer from a former employer who needed a lead designer. One of my freelance clients also acknowledged my web design skills and wanted to pay me a base rate - enough for me to get by on my own (as a freelancer). I have an interview with one of the top web 2.0 applications, and am preparing for my second interview after hearing back from them within less than twenty-four hours after my first interview. I am being profiled for two more contract positions within the city.
Finally, things are looking up. Believe me, I’ve endured years of pain, often even resorting to begging for a full time job. Now, I feel that success is within my grasp.
We shall see how the events unfold. We shall see whether I choose to continue taking on a full time job, going completely freelance, or doing both. The rest remains a mystery for now. I am overwhelmed with fear, yet energized by the excitement of it all.
My creativity is not limited to visual and fashion design. I’m learning how to be a decent cook. Note - decent. I have what I call a “Love and MEH! Relationship” with cooking. There are moments (such as today) where I would get so engrossed with cooking that time simply flies. Other times - I’d rather be doing something else.
I’ve been meaning to cook Munggo for a while as I have not had this dish since the Philippines (or perhaps slightly later… My Mom may have cooked this while we still lived in Calgary). When I found the recipe, I followed it step by step (except my munggo is vegetarian), but found that I needed to add a little bit of my own flavour to it. I added bay leaves and pepper in the mix and it’s mmmm mmmm good!
I finally made some progress on the pendant project. What you see above is my first time creating domino decoupaged pendants. Initially, I had not planned to use dominoes, but since they were available in the dollar store (while I was looking for a glue gun), I decided that I might as well spend $2 and try making a few pendants out of it. The project was easy, although I did find myself having to select a good area of the origami or scrapbooking paper that works best. I’m personally not crazy about using Modge Podge as my glaze. I may pick up some glaze in the store tomorrow.
Although small, I decided to proceed with creating the glass marble pendants with a black felt backing and “home made” bails (made out of twisting some sturdy jewelry wire). I was pleased with how the mini pendants turned out, though the bails could’ve been better. I turned six of the glass marbles into fridge magnets, and I saved the rest for future projects. I need to find a local source of rings with glue pads on them. I am not a ring person myself, but if it’s my creation? I don’t see why I shouldn’t wear rings!
I realized later today that I still had a whole package of shrink film (aka Shrinky Dinks) that I was going to throw away because my initial ShrinkFilm experiment did not work at all. I gave the shrinkfilm one more shot, but instead of using a baking pan, I used cardboard instead. Boy what a difference it made! The plastic came out sturdier and thicker! I may just purchase some markers and a hole punch tomorrow.
Knowing how sturdy the shrink film turned out, I’m actually thinking of cutting it in a certain shape (round or oval) and decoupaging it with origami or scrapbook paper after “baking.”
So instead of polymer clay, I turned glass - at least for the time being. While having an oh so wonderful insomniac evening, I decided to start cutting little circles out of my origami paper and glue (I use Gem Tac) them onto the small glass marbles I purchased in the dollar store. Those marbles look absolutely lovely!
Now I cannot decide what to make of these suckers. Magnets seem to be the most reasonable use for them, but I would not mind making a small pendant as well. Earrings may be a bit too heavy.
The Next Step
I need to find sterling silver jewelry findings. I need bezels or any of those charm-type or ring-type things where you can glue the glass marble onto it. I’m not much of a ring-wearer, but seeing how lovely these marbles turned out inspires me to actually wear a funky ring - one that I’ve created!
And I feel amazing…
I feel quite accomplished after spending about an hour cutting and gluing these marbles. Being the typical Aries I am, I’m great at starting but never good at finishing. So many projects remained in the backburner… At the very least, I have a project out and it’s about 80% finished. Now it will all depend on what I decide to do with them.
Look what I found at the dollar store today! Glass marbles! Although they are not the HUGE glass marbles that I desire, they were still good enough for me to create bubbly magnets, rings, earrings, and mini pendants. I guess I can finally get started after all!
I also purchased some Translucent Liquid Sculpey from eBay since I could not find them in any art store here in Toronto (aka: I’m too lazy to go further because of the cold). I will be using the TLS to seal and glaze my polymer clay projects.
I’m likely not starting this week on the pendants. When I do find time next week, I’ll make sure I post pictures!
When “The Freaks” (an affectionate little nickname I have for three of the most AWESOME friends in the world) get together, we’re almost always doing something creative. Whatever spontaneous “project” we may take on can be completely inane, but heck… we have fun with it.
That night after dinner at North York (located in uptown Toronto… Note that we Freaks are almost exclusively downtowners… It’s a rarity to see us uptown), we went to a Second Cup to just sit and talk before we go our separate ways. While talking, we started building this “sculpture” out of our used Second Cup cups and those “cup protector thingies” (as I call them - I don’t know their names!). We wedged the cinnamon stick into one of those “thingies” and BEHOLD! A Christmassy Chimneyed Tower!
And if you’re curious, I will describe each of The Freaks as I will be mentioning them frequently in this blog.
Ken is an Industrial Design student in OCAD who has an passion for anything interactive and design-related (and beaten up and battered because he’s a massochist har har). He’s quite accomplished as he had works exhibited in Toronto art events such as Nuit Blanche. He’s a VIRGO which makes him the most anal out of all of us. Har har…
Wil is the red-obsessed, bike-obsessed, short-hair-girl-obsessed bald-headed alien. He’s a very talented freelance illustrator with a very distinct loose style. He can critique your work down to every little art detail - which makes him awesome yet at the same time scary (for me, at least). He also has a knack for coming up with the best catchphrases. He is a Scorpio… And you know how Scorpios are…
Barnett may not be focused on visual arts, but he’s one heck of a “comic strip artist” and he comes up with the strangest, funniest scripts (and names for teams, people, and things - whatever you call it). The catch to these scripts and jokes? Many of them come true! He’s a Libra.. does that indicate that he’s somewhat humorously clairvoyant? (an AIR SIGN??)
KatieKat is the creatively stuck wishy-washy web designer who is still trying to find her style and reclaim her undying love for anything creative. She enjoys flutter-punching Ken, booty-calling Wil, and prompting Barnett to joke about something so that it will come true. She is as Aries as it can get…
I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate. George Burns, Comedian (1896-1996)
I know I have not written a journal entry in a while since I was busy catching up with “life” (or “life” was catching up to me). I will likely write a new entry in the next few days. No, the Origami pendant has not yet been created and yes, there are new projects abound. Projects with deadlines.
I am also going to write what’s on my mind - as a creative. I know this is not some kind of informative blog or educational blog or what not, but this is to track my personal development. Perhaps I might as well pour my thoughts on here as part of my attempt to “get over things.” After all, I created this blog to stretch my limits, come out of my comfort zone, and develop courage that a headstrong Double Aries innately has.
If you’re interested, stay tuned. If not… hey… I will have some good quality content posted on here sometime.
